Why I blog

So you, my legion of loyal readers, might be wondering why I have chosen to blog. Doubtless this question vexes you to the point where sleep is but a distant memory, and you are too preoccupied to work, shop for sustenance or dress yourselves properly. Because I cannot abide the suffering of you, my two or three regular readers (Hi, mom!), I will answer your question.

I blog because I hope, one day, to catch the attention of the women who write this blog. Because I want nothing more than to tell them that they may, in fact, be the funniest human beings that ever lived. I have spent the last ten minutes trying to stifle laughter because it's clearly getting on my colleagues' nerves. (And yes, I do work for a living. Inclement weather does a doozy on no-show rates for appointments.) Seriously. The discussion of the correct pronunciation of Beyonce's name alone is totally worth a look.

So, as neither Jessica nor Heather is either a contributor to this site or a first-degree relative thereof, I don't really hold out hope that they're reading at this point. But a boy can dream.